An older woman has said she feels like she has 'won the lottery' after bagging a man 21 years younger because older men 'couldn't keep up'.
Michelle Rinella, 54, from
Texas, gave love another chance world after her divorce and found herself 'bored'
by men her age, who she claimed would be more concerned about 'where they could
park'.
The 54-year-old ignored the
many younger men in their 20s who she claimed 'kept messaging' her until her
now-husband Brandon Graham, 33, got in touch.
The psychologist said that
while there was an instant 'fiery' sexual attraction between them, he shocked
her most with his 'emotional vulnerability' unlike older men who were more
'rigid and didn't need anything from a relationship'.
Michelle had previously been
married to someone who was 11 years her senior but now believes the younger age
gap 'creates passion' due to truck driver Brandon being 'fun, fit, and vital'
and her being 'wise'.
The mother-of-four admitted
that while she originally felt 'upset' by people's stares, now those who judge
them only make their connection stronger because they are 'passionate about fighting
for the relationship'.
While Michelle began the
relationship feeling 'unhopeful', they have now been married for two years and
say their love feels like 'winning the lottery'.
Michelle said: 'I think the
thing about the age gap that made this relationship work is that the age gap
creates passion.
'For me, he is young, fit,
beautiful, vital, and fun. I definitely wasn't finding that with the
50-year-old men. To him, I am wise and established while still being
attractive.
'It was definitely an instant
attraction. On our first date, my first thought was 'he's even more handsome
than in the pictures'. I mean there's obviously the sexual attraction right,
that's like fire.
'But then there was this
emotional attraction. He came with a level of vulnerability that I wasn't used
to. Older men were just more rigid and they didn't need anything from a
relationship.
'For both of us, it just feels
like winning the lottery, everything we had been looking for, so that creates
an amazing level of passion.
Michelle had been on a break
from dating and had only just gotten back into it in September 2019 when she
first met the certified PT online.
Michelle said: 'At first, I
don't think I was very hopeful about it given the age gap. He messaged me. I
opened it and thought to myself, "Another 20-something. Why do they keep
messaging me?"'
'Then I looked at his picture
and thought, "Maybe a quick hello wouldn't hurt!" I sent him a
message that said "How old are you?" and he replied "Old enough
to make you happy". He was right.
'There had only been one other
man, right before Brandon. He was older than me. He was just the opposite of
Brandon.
'He was just terribly rigid and
it was such a boring dating experience that I couldn't keep doing it. Dating
Brandon was a breath of fresh air. There was definitely more excitement.
'The older guy would be like:
"I don't want to go to that place because it's too hard to park". It
felt like he wasn't living his life. They couldn't keep up with me. They were
just boring.
On strangers judging them,
Michelle said: 'The other part of the passion is knowing that people might be
judging us. It makes us passionate about fighting for our relationship. It's
nice to be out just because he's so handsome.
'We walk in the room and it's
like the screeching of a record sound. The whole room goes quiet. People are
looking. It used to really bother me.
'He made me understand that
people are going to look. There's no benefit in trying to make the worst out of
it.
'Maybe people are looking at us
because we're a good-looking couple. If not, maybe they just don't know what
it's like to really feel like this.
Michelle said: 'Right now we're
20 years apart but we're in the same part of our lives. The big thing is that
in 20 years, I'll be 75 and he'll be 55.
'For a while I was pretty
resistant to this as a long-term relationship because of that. He wasn't.
'It wasn't that I couldn't
trust him to be faithful to me right now, it was can I trust you to take care
of elderly me later? The thought of that is hard as we'll be at different parts
of our lives.
'I'll be elderly and he'll
still be young enough to be healthy but I just can't get stuck worrying about
that.'
'Even though others might be
judging us, it just adds to the feelings of attraction now.
The couple got married in 2021
and had an outdoor wedding.
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